The title is “36 Things Every Single Girl Must Do Before She Settles Down.” I was single for way longer than I’ve been married so these types of articles often catch my eye. I thought, “Hmmm. I wonder how many of the 36 I actually did before settling down?” Well, I found out that some of things don’t sound that appealing and wouldn’t have been on my “to do” list ever.
For example, “get drunk during the day.” That sounds sad to me. That sounds like something an alcoholic would do. No, it doesn’t sound like something I would want to do and wasn’t something I ever did. And, “sit at a bar by yourself and drink a martini.” Again, doesn’t sound fun. Women, don’t listen to everything the writer of that article says. It doesn’t sound like she has a whole lot of self-respect to me. Just sayin’
Two more that I don’t like, then I’ll get to the good list. “Go out with someone who actually makes you nervous.” Absolutely not. This world is too weird to do that. Go out with nice people who don’t make you nervous. And if he makes you nervous, not because he’s creepy but because he’s arrogant and makes you feel unworthy, that’s a big turn off to me too.
And “make a list of all your faults,” nope! Not doing it. I might make a list of all my strengths. That I would do. I prefer to focus to the positive rather than the negative.
Now, there are some stuff on the list that I did do, and that I highly recommend. First and foremost, “Finish all the schooling you can.” I tell people that all the time. Get as much education as you can while you are young and single. Even though you might be very poor while doing it, it’ll be worth it in the end. Your “ROI” (return on investment) will be much greater the younger you are when you complete your degrees. And, it’s simply easier to study and commit the time that’s needed, especially to graduate or professional school, when you are not attached to a spouse and children.
“Learn to cook well.” I agree with this one completely, although I didn’t do it. I really see how it would come in handy with a husband and a family. There are another two, “throw yourself into something time consuming” and “get some hobbies.” Maybe cooking could be the thing that triples to fill the bill. I didn’t throw myself into cooking, but I did throw some biscuits I once made at the wall. It was like throwing baseballs. It was my one and only time for biscuit making. That was more than 30 years ago.
My “something time consuming” and “get some hobbies” were things like reading, exercising, hanging out with friends, and attending cultural events on the college campus where I worked.
There are several “alone” activities on the list and I’ve done them all. “Go to a movie alone.” Yes. I remember only once; it was in Little Rock, Arkansas one afternoon in between morning and evening college recruiting events at high schools. “Attend a wedding (or 15) alone.” I attended more like 15 alone, and was in most of them. I was best girl, bridesmaid, cake cutter, guest book hostess, and just about every other job a girlfriend can have at someone else’s wedding. Although it’s not on the list I’ve also eaten in a restaurant alone, many, many times. Do it without a book or your phone. And do it like you’re not embarrassed. Enjoy your own company.
The last alone activity on the list is “live alone.” I lived alone twice. In Searcy, Arkansas I lived in the Griffin-House apartments for 4 years; I had about 400 square feet. Then when I moved to South Florida, I lived in West Palm Beach for 3 years; I had a one bedroom apartment on Spencer Run Road, but it was much nicer and roomier than the first one. It had a beautiful view of a pond and a water fountain, and a lovely porch. In between I lived with various roommates from one to five at a time. I learned a lot about myself by living alone. I had lots of fun living with others. I recommend both.
The last things on the list I’ll mention are the “man” things. “Take out the trash.” Well, yeah. Who else was going to do it? I still do it every now and then. “Do your taxes.” Yeah, that too. I was poor as a church mouse and did the EZ form. Nothing to it. And, “get your finances in order.” Hah! That one I didn’t do. I went into debt for graduate school. When I did meet the man I eventually married I went to the ATM with him one day before he dropped me off at the airport to go on a trip. My debit card was declined for insufficient funds. I was embarrassed, but he handled it beautifully. He just loaned me some money for the trip. Hah, hah! Not sure I ever paid him back. We got married a couple of months later. He took over the finances and has been doing them ever since. However, I do recommend that “getting your finances in order” is a very good thing.
OK, so I’m not a good cook and I’m lousy at managing money; but remember, I prefer concentrating on my good qualities. 😉
Read the article. You might find something interesting in it that I haven’t mentioned.